Less & More: The WFH Mom Edit

Stay cool and type on…

Calling all work-from-home hotties and baddies and saddies and otherwise! Summer break is nearly upon us and that means, for me at least, it’s time to prep all the things to keep sanity high and the work vibes feeling productive as heck.

As long as I have been a mom I have worked from home. While things are different with a soon-to-be-9 year old and a 10 year old than they were with toddlers, I still need to get my mind right before summer break because I want this time to be fun and restful for my kids…but, like, I have crap that needs to get done. 

I have created something of a Summer Sanity Toolkit over the last decade or so of balancing working full time from home managing clients and keeping my little self-employed ship afloat while keeping my kids happy during the long months of summer. Here are some of my go-to tips and tricks for those looooong summer days…

Keep it Communicative

We are so lucky to live in a neighborhood filled with friends for my kids and summers are exactly what I pictured for my boys: lots of running through the neighborhood and playing all day and spending HOURS with buddies. Sometimes in all that summer magic though, mom needs to present a media relations strategy on a Zoom or interview a franchise owner for a press release, and they might not totally get the magical feeling of it all. To keep interruptions to a minimum and my patience to a max, I communicate with my kids and kids playing at my house a ridiculous amount. I will write in my calls to our dry erase schedule, and I make sure to let my kids know how many calls I have for the day. About 15 minutes before I hop on I will remind them I’m hopping on a call and let them know how long it is. They know to keep an eye on the door so no one knocks or makes the dog bark. Last summer I also started putting a sign up to alert the buddies that I was on a call, too. 

Is there still sometimes an ill-fated delivery that sets my dog into a barking frenzy mid-call? Yes. Do kids sometimes need or want my attention during something important? For sure. But setting up expectations and just being open about what’s on tap for my day has helped a lot. 

I am a big fan of setting expectations with my kids and they know right before we get to a destination I will say, “Ok, let’s set expectations.” Summer is no different here. We always have a chat right before school gets out for the year about the expectations for the break and we create our schedule together – I am convinced if they help create the schedule they will stick to it or at least whine less about it. On that note…

Work the Routine

I thrive on a routine even though at my core I’m a chaotic little gremlin person and with self-employment my work schedule can feel very feast or famine. Summer means more flexibility for sure but we still have a daily schedule, even if it’s pretty loose, just to keep all of us thriving. When I sit down with the kids before the end of the school year we work out our summer bucket list (post on that forthcoming) and our schedule so they know what to expect too. I work in chore time into the morning and screens cannot be turned on until you’ve ticked three chores off your list. I am a buzzkill summer learning monster too and my boys know to expect a grade-appropriate workbook to show up on the first day of summer. Workbook time will find its way to the schedule along with lunch hour, outside time, and quiet time so I can focus. Sometimes the schedule is followed to the letter! Sometimes it isn’t and that’s ok!

I work hard to stay on some kind of routine even when I don’t have client calls or work isn’t as heavy for the week. I wake up at 6am as usual, follow my normal morning routine, and carve out times to get stuff done. Whatever routine works best for you and your squad, stick to it. 

Get ‘em Out

And by “out” I mean, out of the house or just outside. You already know I have a great yard with lots to do and I expect my kids to use that space to explore and play and come in for lunch smelling like summertime. I absolutely expect my kids to go out and play. Usually they do and the neighborhood gang will spend hours riding bikes, bug hunting, playing every possible sport, and stalking down the ice cream truck. Sometimes my brain needs a full day of focus and my kids need to get out of dodge so they each do at least two summer camps each year. I think camps are a great investment and it is such a cool way for them to meet or hang with friends, try something new, and blessed be that I can do a full work day during normal hours without shushing anyone. 

This year my kiddos are doing Camp Invention through their school district, a science camp, and a junior zookeeper camp at Brookfield Zoo (the figurative elbows I had to throw in that virtual queue to nab a spot at this summer camp in JANUARY was unreal).  Our park district also offers a lot of daytime activities so sometimes I’ll sign them up for a couple days long cooking class or I’ll head to a coworking space like the local We Rock the Spectrum gym or a board game cafe to clack away at my laptop while my kids enjoy some AC and activities. Google is my bestie when it comes to finding all the new places to work and things to do. 

Tap in Tools

In a perfect world my kids never get on each other’s nerves and they always keep themselves entertained without a screen. But I don’t live in that world and I am, unfortunately, stuck in reality. Much like their summer learning workbooks, our little boredom busters and conflict squashing tools are always ready for the first day of break. Find the tools that work best for what you need and put them to work! 

If my kids truly can’t find anything to do they know they can grab a boredom buster – a popsicle stick with an activity written on each side. The only rules are you have to choose at random (no peeking!) and you have to do one of the things on the stick (no pickin’ til you find something better). It has helped maaaaany an “I’m so bOoOoOoOred” moment. I also get that they are with each other A LOT more in summer so they will have conflict or bad moods. I grabbed reusable ice cubes at the dollar store years ago and wrote some soothing, coping, or conflict resolution things on each. Same deal here – you pick a cube, do the thing, and then see if you feel like you need another one. Sometimes knowing the cubes are a possibility is enough for them to not fight. 

Find the Fun

We usually don’t go on a huge vacation in summer to a far-flung destination but dang, do we know how to find the fun. When I watch White Lotus, yeah, sometimes I’m like despite the unaliving and the scandals this looks like a pretty prime vacation. But over the years I feel like I’ve created a balance of work productivity and finding fun (usually inexpensive!) things to do with the kids. I believe in letting them be bored but everything in moderation and I need some fun too. I like to look up library programs, local nature preserves, unique parks nearby, or set up school friend play dates. We also invest in a pool pass to our community swimming hole every year and the ROI on that thing is insane. We will go swimming at least three times a week every week of summer.

A lot of folks used to think I worked a few hours a week or took off entire days because I was out-and-about with my kiddos and they knew I worked for myself. Nada. Last summer I was clocking 65-to-80-hour work weeks while juggling all the magic we could fit into the day. I am just an insane person. I will get up at 4am to get a ton of work done before the “real” day has even started. I’ll work super late into the night so I can take my kids to a farther away park and out to get a bubble waffle the next day. I have to find those pockets of time to work so we can do fun things.

Tell Guilt to Buzz Off

It is ok to take a break or not totally nail the parent thing every single day, summer or not. I loved Molly’s post about mom guilt and I hope with everything else going on in the world and with the crushing weight of modern parenthood, we can just take it easy on ourselves sometimes. I have days where I feel like I am a terrible PR gal because I focused too much on being a mom or I feel like I’m a terrible mom because I had to put in an 11 hour day because of a client crisis. Guess what. I’m not terrible at either. I’m balancing it all and so are you. Tell your guilt to buzz off and go sip a pineapple mocktail on the patio with your laptop. 

It can be hard to see families on social media going on these crazy amazing vacations or spending every summer second together but, like they say,  comparison is the thief of joy so don’t waste time wondering why not me? Clap for other people and yourself. Everyone’s family and life and schedule and financial situation is so different, so just focus on y-o-u.

No matter how you spend the summer break or what your situation is, it is one of the best times of year to recharge and find little pockets of rest so I hope for all of us those pockets are plentiful. How are you staying sane this summer?

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